Bridge

Step.

Step. It's a cold breeze, but the chill is hopeful. You've climbed a long way, and you pause, start to count. 1. 2.

Step. 100.

Step. It must be two hundred by now, but of course you didn't start at the beginning. Maybe you should have... too late, certainly not worth going back for that. A glance, thrown ahead -- that many, as if you could count them.

Step. It's been quite the hike already. You're not sure you want to look behind, after all, to look down is - ah, well, not that you ever could stop yourself - ah. You have come a good distance. A waver of doubt, and nothing.

Step. Absurd, this. After all, you've no idea what's over there, and you haven't even gotten halfway there and already you're not sure if your foot hurts or not, it's just numb and you can't remember the pain dulling, can't even remember the pain. Was it that long ago?

Step --- ah! your heart pounds, you feel the edge, you gaze into the deep. Green earth... green earth and hard rocks, very nearly the parting gift of a bitter wind.

Step. Your left leg pounds. Was it your left foot that was hurting? You check, but can't see the pain, not even in memories. You don't see any injuries. Your right leg is fine. There's no reason, no excuse for this pain. Is it even pain? you wonder.

Step.

Step. Your body heaves forward, impressively, boastfully onto the next step. You hadn't realized you were in such good shape - it feels like hours since that first step. Maybe it has been hours. Maybe it's been five minutes. No, maybe twenty. You wish you'd brought a watch, then you're glad you left it home. Your leg doesn't hurt anymore.

Step. It's like Jacob's Ladder, in a way. You look upwards and see the heavens, and you're already in them, after all. The old spiritual floats through your head, and stubbornly conquers a corner of your mind. Somehow, it seems a better song than you ever gave it credit for.

Step. The end seems much closer now. You're almost there, which means you can feel it coming closer. Closer. It's just a few more

Step. There, at last, almost, just a bit more, a few more

Step. Not down, don't look down, you've almost gotten there, you've nearly reached the end, after all that, after all the

There's a path. Eyes trace it upward, from the last rung of the bridge to the shambles of bushes, and at last to some high, final peak.


John McCall
Last modified: Sun Jul 29 17:04:37 EDT 2001